Yeah, I know … been there, done that, got the T-shirt — burned it! It’s enough to drive a girl nuts. But it doesn’t have to be like that.

We can change things. We can get the ex back!

That’s why you’re here, right? You wouldn’t be reading this if you didn’t want to get the ex back. You want to save your relationship. Rekindle your love.

But if you are feeling overly anxious to get the ex back, you may be doing and saying all the wrong things. That’s understandable. Just like your guy’s natural reaction – to pull away. It’s human nature to resist this type of pressure. Struggling against human nature is absolutely pointless; it only makes matters worse.

Are you calling your ex too often, constantly sending him e-mails or text messages? Are you trying to make him feel sorry for you? If you’re doing these things, stop! Right now.

So what can I do, you ask, to get my ex boyfriend back? Give this strategy a try.

You must take a completely fresh approach. Begin by breaking off contact with him for a while, doing your own thing. While those lines of communication are closed, focus on ways to improve your personal life rather than focusing on issues in the relationship. (I know; I know. I was resistant, too.) This will absolutely be a challenging time for you. It will take discipline not to fall back into your old ways. But it will be worth it!

Why, you ask? Well, when we don’t pursue them, they generally start seeing us in a different light.

That’s right. To get the ex back, stop pursuing him. You may become mysterious to him in some ways, because he is not sure what you are feeling, doing or planning. And this can work in your favor. Now your ex boyfriend is in a position to miss you, which was not possible when you were smothering him.

Remember, the key to this strategy and to mending a breakup is to work with human nature instead of against it. With this basic strategy, you can restore a balance in the relationship and allow your ex to remember why he was in love with you in the first place.

It’s important to stay grounded and to avoid smothering him. Allow yourself to appear mysterious and he can be reminded of all the reasons he fell in love with you. Be hard to get (just do not overdo it) and let him make the first move, and you will come out ahead. And then you can quit wondering “What can I do to get my ex boyfriend back?”

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